If It Don't Show Today
Thursday May 15, 2008
I have had quite a few people
come up to me and say
why you're looking pretty good
you don't seem sick today
Well, have you ever lived wondering if
each day will be your last
not knowing if there's a tomorrow and
reliving and regreting your past
Have you ever fought daily just
to get out of your bed
had a foggy grey cloud hanging always
over your head
Have you ever lost 80lbs or
had your hair all fall out
wasted away in a chair
with no one about
Oh I have my good days too
when I don't let it show
and some see me those days only
so they don't really know
So all you nonheppers out there who
haven't ever felt this way
don't ask are you really sick if
I don't show it today....
Poem and photo courtesy of J.W. Cutrer
Written 01/04/04
Mr. Cutrer has a gift for words and is able to give a little insight to the harsh realities of living with hepatitis. While this poem elegantly describes the ups and downs of treatment, many of his other poems address so much about what many people struggle with: human frailty, social tolerance, and dignity. Sometimes poetry conveys tough concepts more easily than prose, and for that, I respect Mr. Cutrer's accomplishments. Definitely look here for more of his work.
come up to me and say
why you're looking pretty good
you don't seem sick today
Well, have you ever lived wondering if
each day will be your last
not knowing if there's a tomorrow and
reliving and regreting your past
Have you ever fought daily just
to get out of your bed
had a foggy grey cloud hanging always
over your head
Have you ever lost 80lbs or
had your hair all fall out
wasted away in a chair
with no one about
Oh I have my good days too
when I don't let it show
and some see me those days only
so they don't really know
So all you nonheppers out there who
haven't ever felt this way
don't ask are you really sick if
I don't show it today....
Poem and photo courtesy of J.W. Cutrer
Written 01/04/04
Mr. Cutrer has a gift for words and is able to give a little insight to the harsh realities of living with hepatitis. While this poem elegantly describes the ups and downs of treatment, many of his other poems address so much about what many people struggle with: human frailty, social tolerance, and dignity. Sometimes poetry conveys tough concepts more easily than prose, and for that, I respect Mr. Cutrer's accomplishments. Definitely look here for more of his work.
Comments
Hey, Charles, you scored when you met up with John Cutrer. I’ve enjoyed both him and his heart felt words for a handful of years. He baby sat me many times when I did HCV treatment. We were both HCV forum members when I met him. That time was 5 yrs ago.
John even called an unplanned birthday party for me in 2004 and it was a party I’ll not ever forget. The party lasted 10 hrs non-stop and I had a blast and still smile warmly when I think about it. People from all over the world dropped in just to say Happy Birthday. It was the best party I have ever attended in my honor. I’m not one for parties of any sort but this particular party was and remains truly special.
Thanks again, John, and thank you Charles!
I too know John….he is a wonderful man and a gifted writer. His poetry has inspired those of us from the hepatitis forums for many years now.
He is a great source of support and comfort to those of us who know him. I feel he speaks for us all in his poetry. We have all felt the same way at one time or another in our battle with this disease.
Thank you for putting his work out there for public consumption…maybe it will play a part in fostering awareness and erasing the stigma of this disease!
How wonderful can this be for John’s poems to be shared here! It was an honor to have known John 5 yrs. and finally met him last summer. I call him Bro.
Bro. is the one who inspired me to write many poems about The Dragon (Hep C) not only about what we feel but to share our experiences of living with it gives others a message that they do not have to be alone in this fight.
I love ya Bro!
LeftyLO
I too know Sir J. Not as long in time as others but with Sir J. his kindness covers you and feels like it’s always been a part of you. Glad to see others will read his words and maybe have more understanding of the disease and how it changes your everyday.
Thank you so much Sir J for your enlightening words what Hep C is concerned.. As I told you several months ago, my sweet and dear friend suffers from Hep C. He cannot take any of these treatments, because it makes him so sick and he has many other ailments of which he suffers! Soon they will ‘take away’ one of his feet.. terrible! I often wonder… why oh why is HE?? I cry with him and my love will die with him when he fades away.. I love him so..